three moments.

there are times in one’s life where a lesson must be learned. the ebb and the flow, the sunrise and the sunset. this balance must be maintained. whether it’s lows or highs, these are our moments. these moments that make up the essence of life. these are my moments:

1. i like poop.

sometimes i fart in french because it sounds classier.

2. coffee shots.

i got a cup of coffee:

other person: “how’s your creamer treating you?”

me: “isn’t that sexual harassment?”

3. i get it. lesbians can be described as “vagitarians.” especially because a lot of lesbians are vegetarians. whatever, whatever.

some people describe me as a “vagitarian” not because i’m a lesbian, but because i’ve recently stopped eating ass. it’s just, like, empty calories. i had to let it go.

sometimes thoughts are weird, guys.

this is my ebb.

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